| The great thing about owning your own website is that when you have
something to say, no one can stop you from saying it. The closer that we
get to Mother's Day, the more I feel I need to write this special
article as a way of saying "thanks" to my own mom.
Most girls want to
be just like their moms when they grow up. But are most women happy when
they turn around and realize that they have actually become their
moms? I can honestly say that I am. My childhood
wasn't easy for my mom. After finally freeing our family of life with an
abusive man, she worked multiple jobs to make sure that my sister and I
always had "nice" things. Not Porsches when we turned 16 or anything
like that. But new clothes for school, money for activities, and plenty
to be proud of. The reason I know now what a fantastic job she did is
that in retrospect, I never felt like I was lacking for anything despite
the fact that we were definitely not among the wealthiest kids in our
neighborhood.
| I remember when I was a teenager the
struggles that my mom had with me. I wasn't a bad kid, but I was
a curious kid with a lot of energy and ideas. And when I screwed
up, she had to find a way to let me know that without breaking
my spirit. Sometimes she would write me letters explaining how
hard it was for her to come down on me the way that she was but
why it was necessary if I was going to be a good person. And she
was 100% right. |
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I always had a desire to please my mother. I held
myself to very high standards. When I didn't meet those standards, she
was always the one there to get me on track. She never coddled me or
indulged my feeling sorry for myself. Instead, she taught me how to pick
myself back up and keep going. If I had a nickel for every time she told
me to stop caring so much about what others thought about me and to just
be myself.....
I think that my mother really started hitting her
stride as I emerged from adolescence. Despite contracting Lyme's disease
and permanently losing some of her vision, she was always there to help
guide me through the important decisions in my life. Moving away for
college was incredibly difficult for me because, among other things, it
was hard not to be with her.
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As the years passed and my wedding
approached, the reality hit me more and more that it was time
for me to move on to the next phase of my life, the one where it
was someone else's turn to be there for me each day when I had
joys and troubles. She spoke at my rehearsal dinner and gave me
a handkerchief that had been a baby bonnet she had saved for
almost 25 years. I cannot imagine what was going through her
mind as she ironed that hankie over and over to get it just
right for my big day. |
When I became pregnant, there was no doubt in my mind
that I wanted (needed?) my mom to be there for me when I delivered. And
when I called her late on a Sunday night to tell her I was in labor, she
and my stepdad immediately drove 4 hours into the middle of the night so
that she could be in the delivery room with me. My mom standing beside
my husband, the two most important people in my life watched the next
most important person enter it.
| Now the distance between my mom's home in
Florida and my home in Indianapolis seems like a million miles
sometimes. But thankfully a phone call is much shorter. Mom made
sure that she was here to see my second daughter being born as
well. Now she is entering her own next phase of life as
"grandmother" instead of just "mother," with two more young
girls lives to help shape. |
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My becoming a mother has helped me truly see how lucky
I was to have her all these years. Yes, we have the same ups and downs
and ins and outs as any other mother and daughter. And yet, I know that
if my daughters love and admire me even half as much as I do my mother,
I will be the luckiest mom in the world. So
Happy Mother's Day, Cindy Ballard. You've earned it.
Love, Tricia
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